Wedding Stress

Wedding planning means stationary decisions, guest list debates, color choices, music picks, attire searches, and more.  Let’s face it, wedding planning can take over your life and it can be really stressful… but it doesn’t have to be!

Sure, if you let them, the barrage of choices and decisions awaiting your opinion can occupy your every waking moment, but it’s not necessary!  Wedding planning should be fun; and it doesn’t need to take over your whole life.  All the planning will eventually lead up to a special day, and although important the event is just that — an hour, day, or weekend of celebration honoring the commitment you and your spouse plan to make to one another. The real work begins after the “I Dos” are uttered, and nobody likes the sight of a ragged bride, so keep the stress to a minimum during the planning process!  My advice?

  1. Enlist the help of family and friends.  You can’t do everything on your own, nor should you.  Sharing the workload is sharing the excitement, too! Bridesmaids, siblings, parents and friends can help out if you let them, so practice those delegation skills, bride!
  2. Take time off. It’s not realistic to think you can plan your wedding 24 hours a day 7 days a week.  Make sure you make time during the crazy planning process to exercise, keep up hobbies or activities you enjoy, hang out with friends just for the fun of it (not to try on bridesmaid dresses!), maybe get a massage to unwind and relax, and most importantly… spend quality time with your fiance! Designating specific blocks of time for wedding tasks and setting “free” time aside for other activities is a good way to ensure you don’t neglect the non-wedding parts of your life.  Giving yourself a break from your “second job” can do wonders to help refresh your energy!
  3. Don’t get lost in the planning. Your big day is very important to you, and those who care about you; but that doesn’t mean you can prioritize your upcoming nuptials above everything else going on in life.  It’s hard to believe sometimes but yes the earth is still spinning even as you’re counting down the days till you walk down the aisle; and once your wedding and honeymoon are over you’re eventually going to need to rejoin reality.  Help make that transition less painful by keeping a foot outside the “wedding zone” at all times.  For example, perhaps you have some family and friends going through important or tough times themselves who may need your support or attention.  Or maybe you have a job that you’re letting drop to the bottom of your priority list below wedding chores — will you regret that later if you miss a promotion or raise due to your underperformance at work? Yes, wedding planning is fun and exciting, but there are other things and people in life that need your energy and attention too — make sure you keep things in perspective!
  4. Time management. There are lots of to-do lists out there, that tell you which tasks need to be completed by which time benchmark.  Use them, they’re helpful! Just as not every decision needs to be made the week of your engagement, you shouldn’t leave everything till the last minute either.  Managing your time and spacing out the large tasks you need to accomplish throughout the process will help keep the stress to a minimum.
  5. Money management. There is nothing more stressful than watching your debt climb as the clock counts down to your wedding day.  Do yourself and your marriage a HUGE favor and do not hold a wedding you cannot afford.  Sit down and have a serious conversation with your fiance and any other potential contributors (e.g., parents) at the outset about what you can realistically afford and – here’s the catch – make sure you stick to it!  Track any and all money you spend on deposits and purchases in real-time is vital to preventing yourself from over-spending.  Remember, your wedding is one day – you should not be paying for it for years to come.

Yes an engagement starts the countdown clock to the big day, but your engagement period is very special apart from the planning process and you should enjoy every minute of it!!!  Your engagement period will fly by and before you know it you’ll be married, so cherish that time before it’s gone!

If it feels like wedding planning is taking over your life or you feel tense, take a deep breath and try to follow these 5 basic tips.  Just remember, we’ve all been there and although it’s an exciting time in life the process can sometimes be stressful.  You have to keep your eyes on the prize and don’t let the stress get you.

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